nilesfunnies

Thursday, January 27, 2005

[nilesfunnies] Fw: The dream of chickens



One night, Harry went to bed. Harry did like he always does, kissing his
wife, crawling into bed and falling to sleep.

All of a sudden, he wakes up to find an elderly man standing in front of
his bed.

"What the hell are you doing in my bedroom?......and who are you?" he
asked.

"This is not your bedroom," the man replied, "I am St. Peter, and you are
in heaven."

"WHAT!?? Are you saying I'm dead? I don't want to die.....I'm too young."
said Harry. "If I'm dead, I want you to send me back immediately."

"It's not that easy", said St.Peter, "if you want to return you can only
return as a hen. Wouldn't you rather stay in heaven???"

Harry thought about it for a while, and figured out that a hen probably
has a nice and relaxed life. Running around with a rooster can't be that
bad.

"I want to return as a hen." Harry replied.

And in the next second, he found himself in a chicken run, really nicely
feathered. But man, his arse felt like it was gonna blow... then along
came the rooster.

"Hey, you must be the new hen on the farm." he said. "How are you?"

"Well, it's OK I guess, but it feels like my arse is about to explode."

"Oh that!" said the rooster. "That's only the ovulation going on. Have you
never laid an egg before??"

"No, how do I do that?" Harry asked.

"Cluck twice, and then you push all you can."

Harry clucked twice, and pushed more than he was good for, and then 'Plop'
and an egg appeared.

"Wow" Harry said "that felt really good!" So he clucked again and squeezed
and yet another egg appeared.

He was about to lay a third when he heard his wife shout: "Harry, for Gods
sake wake up, you're shitting all over the bed!"


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