[nilesfunnies] Signs

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Purported all to be signs on doors, trucks, windows, etc.

Signs Sign over a Gynaecologist's Office:

"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

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At a Proctologist's door:

"To expedite your visit please back in."

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On a Plumber's truck:

"We repair what your husband fixed."

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On a Septic Tank Truck:

"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels"

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Another Septic Tank Truck sign:

"We're #1 in the #2 business."

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On a Plumber's truck:

"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

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Pizza Shop Slogan:

"7 days without pizza makes one weak."

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At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:

"Invite us to your next blow-out."

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On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:

"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"

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At a Towing company:

"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

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On an Electrician's truck:

"Let us remove your shorts."

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In a Non-smoking Area:

"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate
action."

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On a Maternity Room door:

"Push. Push. Push."

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At an Optometrist's Office:

"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right
place."

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On a Taxidermist's window:

"We really know our stuff."

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In a Podiatrist's office:

"Time wounds all heels."

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On a Fence:

"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."

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At a Car Dealership:

"The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment."

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Outside a Muffler Shop:

"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

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In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

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At the Electric Company:

"We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't,
you will be."

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In a Restaurant window:

"Don't stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up."