[nilesfunnies] Fw: More 'old' lawyer jokes

More 'old' lawyer jokes

Reasonable Doubt?

Scene: A court room in Oklahoma where a person is on
trial for murder. There is strong evidence indicating guilt;
however, there is no corpse. In the defense's closing
statement the lawyer, knowing that his client will probably
be convicted, resorts to a clever trick.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have a surprise for you.
Within one minute, the person presumed dead in this case
will walk into the court room." The jury, somewhat stunned,
all look at the door. A minute passes. Nothing happens.

The lawyer: "Actually, I made up the previous statement.
But you all looked on with anticipation. I, therefore, put it to
you that there is reasonable doubt in this case as to whether
anyone was killed and insist that you return a verdict of not
guilty." The jury, clearly confused, retires to deliberate.

A very few minutes later, they return and a representative
pronounces a verdict of 'guilty'. "But how?" inquires the
lawyer. "You must have had some doubt; I saw all of you
stare at the door."

Answers the representative: "Well, we all HAD some
doubt and we all DID look at the door. But your client didn't."
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You will be pleased to hear that there is nothing new under the sun.
This from John Evelyn's diary:

26th November 1686: I din'ed at my Lord Chancelors, where being three
other Serjeants at Law, after dinner being cheerfull and free, they told
their severall stories, how long they had detained their clients in
tedious process, by their tricks, as so many highway thieves should have
met and discovered the severall purses they had taken. This they made
but a jeast of; but God is not mocked.

Tim

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